Smooth Move – A Farther’s Guide to Moving Homes with a Toddler in Tow
In February 2021 we moved home. This was stressful on three fronts:
1. Moving house is one of the most stressful things a person can do, next to bankruptcy, divorce and handing someone your phone to show them a photo only to see them continue swiping.
2. We’re in the middle of a global pandemic, under a lockdown where the rules change by the minute.
3. Although my daughter Saffy is just approaching two years old, she already has the fighting spirit of a drunken 40 year old Viking warrior.
So here are my top tips for a successful house move when that little one in your life is too small to reason with, but tall enough to kick you in the knackers and run away each time you try to grab hold of them. This one is not about taking water meter readings and moving your clubcard address, there are plenty of other places for that advice.
Before the move
1. Introduce them to their new home.
Prior to moving day we made regular trips to our future home. We took walks on the street outside and I organised viewings to allow Saffy to get used to the house and its layout. I let her explore, climb the stairs and get a feel for the place and the surroundings. I also talked to her about the new house as often as possible and tried to explain that we would soon be leaving our old house.
2. Don’t introduce anything new.
I tried to keep things as normal as possible even as the boxes began piling up and familiar things started to disappear from shelves and walls. If you are still breastfeeding now is not the time to call it quits, nor is it the time to introduce potty training or a new sleep schedule. There’s lots of other things to worry about for the time being. In the preceding days to moving, I didn’t put anything more exotic than a corn on the cob on Saffy’s meal plate.
3. If you can, pay to take the stress away.
If you’re time poor but have the cash, a lot of moving companies offer a packing service for not much extra. The company I hired, Stockport Removals, were second to none and their team boxed up the entire house in less than half a day. It would have easily taken me a week to achieve the same, which, as a frontline worker with a baby, is time I do not have. They also dismantled items on moving day morning, which meant Saffy could spend the last night in her cot. They reassembled everything in the new home too.
4. Have an action pack at the ready.
Just as you will need ready access to your personal essentials like phone charger, wallet and snacks, you should also have all your child’s special things within easy reach. Don’t just think food and nappies, but consider comfort too. My action pack for Saffy included nappies, wipes, snacks, her favourite Cat in the Hat toy and, as I knew we’d be without Netflix for the first few days, a memory stick full of her favourite shows.
5. Say goodbye properly.
While the moving date took place on a nursery day, I did my best to include Saffy in the big change. I tried to explain in ways she would understand, saying things like “tomorrow, you will be eating/sleeping in a new house” while smiling and nodding a lot. I gave Saffy a small suitcase and we had lots of fun packing items from her room, then taking them out, laughing and putting them back in again. Then taking them out and putting them back in again. Then taking them out…
Moving Day
6. Child care! Child care! Child care!
Get someone else to hold that baby from dawn ‘til dusk. I dropped Saffy off at nursery at 8am and asked my parents collect her and keep her entertained as I unboxed. This was invaluable; I did not complete and get the keys until late afternoon so there was much to do when we got to the new house with only a limited time to do it. Having my parents take Saffy for walks around her new garden bought me time to achieve my next top tip…
7. Sort out your child’s room first.
Once through the door, this should be your number one priority. By the time we got our keys bedtime was already fast approaching, so I worked to get the get the cot up and put as many familiar toys, pictures and furnishings in the room as possible. It quickly established a familiar environment and helped re-assure Saffy that her life possessions (Moo-Moo the cow and Baa-Baa the sheep included) hadn’t disappeared forever on the back of a truck.
8. Get a food shop in as soon as possible.
Don’t get so tied up with jobs that you forget to feed yourself or others who rely on you. For convenience you may want to arrange a delivery, or do a late night shop if there’s someone who can stay in the house while your child sleeps. Don’t leave it to the point where it’s your child’s tea time and the cupboard is barer than Old Mother Hubbard’s.
9. You cannot give enough love
Expect a few wakeups the first night and, if you’ve got a clingy one, for them to be stuck to your leg like an Anglesey limpet for at least a few days. A month in, and what little sleep routine we had is slowly returning (with a new staunch refusal to sleep in her own bed from 3am). But I expect, with time, this phase will pass with a lot of cuddles, a little negotiation and a lot of story time.
After the move
10. Keep to a routine but take regular breaks
Little ones thrive on routine; meals at the same time, bath at the same time, bed at the same time. But be sure that you don’t get distracted by all the work that now lies ahead of you – schedule time for fun, games, exploration and regular walks. There will always be house work to do, even years after your new house becomes a home – so why not spend an hour using those empty moving boxes to build a play fort?
11. Involve them in decorating decisions.
Finally, help them make their space their own. My daughter loves the outdoors, so I decided on a nature theme for her new room. While I had to help with some of the trickier parts of decoration, like swapping out the plug sockets and ripping out old fitted furniture, Saffy had a wonderful time doing leaf prints on her feature wall and choosing where she wants her book shelf and chair placing. Her new room is finished and better than before. Now the tricky part – getting her to sleep in it!
Children adapt easily to change. Try not to worry and they won’t worry too. Just keep them calm and be there for them.
Excellent tips – certainly will come in handy
These are fantastic tips thank you xx
Thank you for the tips, they will come in so useful when we look to move next summer!